They often say the first step towards healing is admission of guilt. For thespian Sello Maake KaNcube, he admitted that he W's once abusive but promised that it would never happen again.
Sello Maake KaNcube admitted to Kaya 959 hosts Dineo Ranaka and Sol Phenduka that he was an abusive partner. The hosts asked him if he h ever abused a woman and he admitted by responding with, “Yes I did”.
He then continued by saying, “For me, it took introspection. When I saw I had my father’s temperament…I practised a timeout. I realised what was one of the drivers [to the abuse] which was insecurity and jealousy. After I discovered that then there was the beginning of introspection and through that, I realised what were some of the drivers.”
He then shares a bit of advise, “Deal with yourself first. It’s not what the other person does, it’s how you react to it
Sello made a promise that he would never lay hands on a woman ever again, “For as long as I live, it won’t happen again. We have to have honest and sincere conversations about it,” he added.
Speaking on GBV Sello said, “There is gender-based violence that is serial or psycho and there is there gender-based violence that is inter-partner violence and there are those who are rapists and pedophiles.”
Sello became a gender based violence activist for an organisations called 'Act Now' but he lost his spot because of this.
Sello told Sunday World, “After the fight, I asked her to go to the police and get me arrested for what I had done to her. But she said she had forgiven me, basically, we forgave each other and moved on with our lives. This is something that I’m not proud of and still haunts me even today, and I wish I could have handled the situation differently.
“It hurts me that these people are now using my past to undermine my efforts to fight gender-based violence in this country. I challenge any woman to come out now and say I had abused her since then,” the publication quoted him.
He was once quoted by Daily Sun saying, "When I abused her, it wasn't because I was poor or anything but I was scared of losing her."
Sello has turned over a new leaf and recently celebrated his 1st wedding anniversary with wife Pearl Mbewe.
Gushing about her on Instagram he said, “I made that decision the day I went to pay lobola when I said to my delegation, please don’t negotiate any amount with the family. Whatever they want, please tell them I will pay it because there are no ways you can put a price on a person who practically saved your career and your life. It took me 40 years to find her and God willing, I plan on giving her the best 40 years of life.”
Image credit: Instagram