Khaya Dlanga's Weekend From Hell

He was losing it

By  | Jul 26, 2021, 11:13 AM  | Top of the

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Multi-talented author and entrepreneur Khaya Dlanga has shared what transpired when he thought he was losing his mind.

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Khaya took to Instagram to let us in on the worst day of his life. He said, "You know when you’re in the middle of having a good time and then you remember a bad you had? This is me remembering a Sunday I had a few years ago, a day straight from the armpits of Satan himself.

"I had taken a flight from a hot Durban to Cape Town. The weather was considerably Cold and wet when I landed. Got an Uber to take me home. I couldn’t find my house keys. Pants, backpack, suitcase. No house keys. At this stage I was concerned that someone would call the cops on me because my clothes were on the floor as I was rampaging through my bag.

"At some point I convinced myself that I must have left them in my car in the garage. Not possible because I wouldn’t have been able to close the garage door if they were still inside. The rain was making me increasingly wet.
Maybe the office? So I called another Uber. My office was no more than a 3 minute drive from my place in Cape Town.

"They were not there either. I had convinced myself at this stage that I had left them in the JHB office. I was dismayed. I took my bags to the hotel across the road and felt sorry for myself and curled into a fetal position on the chairs at reception. Just as I was considering booking a room, I had an idea. To call my helper because she has the spare key.

I agonised whether to call her or not while she relaxed at home. I texted her. There was no answer for a while. I figured she was in those church services that take a billion hours to end. She called me after 100 billion hours. I was right, she was in a billion hours church service.

"We agreed that I’d send an Uber to pick up my keys and drop them off at the hotel where I was waiting. I got the keys. Got home. Dropped my bags. But now I was starving. I hadn’t eaten all day. I wanted to go buy isibindi (liver)

"I went outside and opened the garage door. No car. I panicked for 0.05 seconds before I remembered that I’d left my car in the parking lot of the hotel opposite the office. THE VERY SAME HOTEL I HAD BEEN WAITING FOR MY HOUSE KEYS FOR HOURS!

"But wait, there’s more. I also remembered that my house keys were in the car all along. I went through self-imposed mgowo on that Sunday. And satan had nothing to do with it"

The comments section was buzzing with laughter. These were people's reactions:

@nikiwebikitsha said, “Yhu so triggered by this story, 😂reminds me of a hellish episode a decade or so ago after attending the J&B met - involving broken heels, missing flat keys, dead phone batteries and to top it all off, the flight back to JHB was diverted to Durban cause of bad weather. I want to cry just thinking about it. Honestly, I don’t know how any of us remain sane”

@mpumie_siwela said, “🙈🙈🙈🙈😂😂🤣it happens to the best of us. Uxolo”

@livhu_1n said, “😂😂😂😂 these things do really happen to you. Just like a movie”

@teedolwetuy said, “😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 this is the kind of borderline stuff I go through everyday” 

Do you remember a day when you thought you were losing your mind? 

Main Image Credit: Instagram/@khayadlanga
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